It is 11:35 pm and what should I be doing. I should be sleeping that’s what I should be doing, but instead, my fingers are moving up and down, side to side typing letters from a keyboard onto this format, in an effort to explain what I did and how I feel about the day I just experienced. Another day has passed, hours have slipped away, and more time has gone never to pass before me again. Time is a curious thing. While we are in the moment, we may not be aware, that while we are experiencing what we are experiencing, that we will never ever live or retrieve that second, minute, or hour again.
What if everyone really thought about each second of their life as a precious, fragile and valuable experience never to regain? Would we live life differently, make better decisions or carry out our plans. Do I dare think that I don’t live this way now? Do I move on and live the way I have been realizing that each second that I type on this keyboard is a second of my life that I will never get back.
Am I fully going to appreciate this alone time with myself right now, tomorrow, next week or in a year; to risk that I may not remember this journal entry, my username or password. If that is to be the case, should I stop right now and think about what or if I should continue typing. Is it worth the seconds, never to replace again? Or maybe just maybe I can appreciate the time I have alone in the silence of my home at now 11:45 pm. Having the ability to write out my thoughts without receiving pressure from anyone to record or dictate what it is that they want me to write. These are my own words typed on my very own computer, in the quietness of my very own space. Yes, twelve minutes have passed since I started typing but what would I have done if not this. How would I have spent the last 12 minutes of my life if it wasn’t but to journal? Am I to move on living my life in regret that I didn’t choose to do something differently. Possibly, the answer to that question is yes.
Of course, there are numerous things I could have done differently in the last now 15 minutes of my life. One I can think of is spending time with my Lord and Savior. Spending time with him in the last 15 minutes would have most definitely benefited me more than typing about the regret of the way I’ve spent the last few moments of this day. Oh, how sweet any time spent with my Lord and Savior. Furthermore, there is never any regret with time passed with Him. To hear His sweet voice and feel the power of his words as I read and to lie down to sleep knowing that I have just sat at the feet of Jesus. Is time precious and should there be remorse felt over moments vanished and foolishly idled away?
Yes, yes, and yes I would say each second of the day is precious and a gift from the Lord above. Moving forward I will pray that I spend my time wisely and that He guide and lead me moment by moment in the fullness of His grace, mercy, and love.
-excerpt from daily journal 08-17-16